Month: February 2018 Page 1 of 2

“Surprise is the greatest gift which life can grant us.”  – Boris Pasternak.

I’m a big believer in having personal and professional goals and plans to achieve them.

It’s my view that spending time devising and pursuing goals is time well spent. Having well-formed goals and action plans enable us to make the best use of our time.

That said I also believe that we need to leave some room in our life for unexpected surprises and opportunities. I can recall countless situations that people have described to me concerning unexpected events and situations that were positive. In many cases they were exactly what they needed at that point in time. Some refer to these as serendipity, which the dictionary defines as “the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way.”

A great recent example of serendipity relates to a story from last Christmas concerning the royal family. Karen Anvil of Watlington in Norfolk went to Sandringham House in Norfolk on Christmas Day to watch the royal family go to church.

Whilst there she took a once in a lifetime photograph of four beaming royals (The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle). That picture has changed Karen and her daughter Rachel’s lives.

She posted the picture on social media and that simple act had very positive unexpected consequences for her and her family.

When she woke up on Christmas morning and travelled to Sandringham, she would have had no clue that her life was going to change. Furthermore, she wouldn’t have envisaged that the picture she took would make the front pages of the Sun, Daily Mail, Mirror, Star, Daily Telegraph and Express newspapers.

It was also featured in the international media. Karen said that more than 50 publications worldwide contacted her asking to use the photo. Countries included Canada, Spain, Italy, USA and Japan. It was also on the front cover of the January edition of Hello magazine.

As a result of the media interest, Karen got an agent who handled all requests for publication. The unexpected commission she earned from publication of the image is a welcome boost for Karen and her family. Karen is a single mum and has two jobs in order to support her family.

Rachel plans to study at university. It’s not clear how much Karen earned from the photograph but on Christmas Day, Ms Anvil told the BBC she hoped to fund her daughter’s university education from the image sales. Karen will be able to pay for all of Rachel’s books and help pay her rent whilst she is studying.

Karen’s agent Ken Goff reported that as well as good sales in the UK the photo sales abroad were healthy. The unexpected windfall will enable Karen to do some things that she didn’t imagine she would be able to afford. These include driving lessons for Rachel and a trip to the United States in December to celebrate Rachel’s 18^th birthday.

Karen plans to return to Sandringham next Christmas, as she wants to see the royal babies. Perhaps she will take another life changing snap!

Karen was doing something that interested her on Christmas day. It just goes to prove that sometimes in life you just have to show up and engage in activities that interest you and you truly enjoy.

When we pursue hobbies and interests that we are passionate about and make us happy, some unexpected magic can occur.

It’s therefore important to leave some room in our life for the universe to work its magic and to do things we are passionate about.

The story is also a great lesson to always carry a camera as you never know what images you will be able to capture.

This week, why not take some time out to reflect and consider if you are dedicating enough time to things that you are interested in, are passionate about or bring you joy.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“With the past, I have nothing to do; nor with the future. I live now.”
–  Ralph Waldo Emerson.

I paused today and was thinking about how many people live their life looking at the rear view mirror and replaying memories and images of the past. Alternatively, they flip forward to the future and start imagining how life can be. Depending on which lens they use, they can either play a happy movie or a scary one.

Over the years I’ve noticed that due to the busyness of modern life very few people take the time to just be and appreciate the present moment. Sometimes it’s good to calm your mind, detach from the past and stop yourself predicting the future.

When we engage in this switching between the past and the future, it can act as a distraction and affect our concentration levels. Frequent interruptions, over committing our time, e mail and social media notifications can all impact our ability to concentrate. They all make it challenging for us to have a sharp focus and can mean that we aren’t fully present with the task or person right in front of us.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of replaying the past and wishing things have worked out differently or that you had spoken up when you had concerns about something. All too easily, we can criticise ourselves for mistakes and feel anxious about disappointments and setbacks. All these things make it difficult to be present and in the moment. The harsh reality is that it is what it is, it can’t be changed. We can learn to draw the lessons from our experiences and then choose to let the incident go mentally.

In the event we catch ourselves over thinking and seeking to predict the future, wondering what may happen, we can decide to bring our thoughts back to the present moment. We can clear and calm our mind.

We can do this by focusing on our breathing by taking a deep breath in and counting to seven, then exhaling to the count of seven. Repeating this process three times can help calm our mind and return to what’s in front of us and enable us to get into the now.

When we engage more fully with the present moment, we increase productivity and complete tasks more easily. We listen more effectively and as a result have a better connection and relationships with others.

Quietening our mind helps us to feel centred, relaxed and have a greater sense of assurance. This enables our mind to be clearer, gives us more clarity and increases our focus. When we’re in this state, life appears smoother, easy and effortless and things seem to flow more naturally.

The more time we spend in our heads can lead us to feel less satisfied with life. By reducing the noise and activity in our head and focusing on the now, we can feel happier and in control.

I saw a banner outside the British library once which can inspire us all to be present more often. It said “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift that’s why they call it the present.”

Making the decision to be present more often takes practice as we have years of programming and conditioning to overcome. It requires a change of habits and is best achieved by small consistent actions.

You can start your new approach with activities that you do and love such as running, walking, gardening, swimming, cycling etc.

You can also choose to adopt a more mindful approach to one of your regular routines such as washing up, vacuuming, eating etc. Essentially what we are doing with this approach is bringing more focus to the present moment, quieting the mind and away from the constant planning and reviewing process.

This week why not take some time out to reflect and consider what actions you need to take to become more focused and engaged with the present moment more often.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“I try to be grateful for the abundance of the blessings that I have, for the journey that I’m on and to relish each day as a gift.” James McGreevey.

In life we have a choice about where we put our attention.

We can focus on what we lack, our weaknesses, our limitations and what’s missing in our life. We can have limited appreciation for our material possessions, what we have earned or the people in our life and what they bring to our it.

In contrast we can choose to focus our time and mind in an abundant way and appreciate all that we have in life including our possessions and how people enrich our life.

We can have gratitude for our strengths and talents, the opportunities and all the experiences that we have. In this state we will view any challenges we have encountered as a lesson or insight instead of seeing ourselves as victims.

The mindset we choose to adopt will have an impact on our body and energy. An abundant mindset is when you believe that there are enough resources for us all to share. Life takes on a different meaning when you think in this way. It has a different look and feel to it.

When we think abundantly we feel more optimistic and this helps us to feel lighter and more energised. We are likely to attract positive circumstances as our self talk is more empowering and drives positive behaviours which create great results.

Conversely, a scarcity mindset will have a negative impact on our mood and energy levels. Our bodies are likely to feel heavy; our self-talk is negative and this creates dis-empowering behaviours and poor results. This kind of mindset can be a self- fulfilling prophecy and create more results that reinforce a feeling of lack.

Thinking in an abundant way helps to contribute to a feeling of security, helps us to feel confident and have high self-worth levels.

We feel secure when interacting with others. As a result we form positive relationships, look to be collaborative rather than overly competitive and create “win/win” scenarios.

When I refer to abundance I’m not just meaning money. I am thinking about all of life’s riches such as all the things to be grateful for, people and relationships, available resources, experiences, our qualities, gifts and talents.

In contrast when we have feelings of lack we may have difficulty sharing credit or recognising the contribution of others. The scarcity mentality is limiting and may mean that too much time and energy is wasted on conflict, negative thinking and repressing creativity. On the other hand, the abundance mentality is fearless, it’s free, and it’s immune to criticism.

In order to feel abundant we need to get better at noticing and recognising what is available to us in terms of opportunities, resources and choices. We aren’t wired to notice things or be particularly observant. Therefore we don’t have to feel stupid if we fail to notice things like opportunities. It just depends what our mind is primed to see.

You can test your observation skills by looking out for yellow cars. You may be surprised at how many you see when you look for them. The yellow cars were always on your journeys but you may not have noticed them unless you were specifically trying to spot them.

If you focus on scarcity you will find evidence to support this. If you want to notice abundance you will find it. In life, we get what we look for!

What we choose to focus on grows.

This week, why not take some time to reflect and consider if you spend sufficient time thinking in an abundant way and if you notice opportunity and things to appreciate.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk