Month: July 2023 Page 1 of 2

“With the past, I have nothing to do; nor with the future. I live now.” Ralph Waldo Emerson.

I saw an interview with England cricket captain Ben Stokes last week and he was asked if he regretted a decision, he made in a match several weeks ago. His reply was an emphatic no and based on his belief that he couldn’t change it or the outcome, so why waste energy thinking about it.

It got me thinking about how many people live their life looking at the rear-view mirror and replaying memories and images of the past. They walk into the future backwards! Alternatively, they flip forward to the future and start imagining how life can be. Depending on which lens they use, they can either play a happy movie or a scary one.

However, few people actually take the time to just be and appreciate the present moment. Sometimes it’s good to calm your mind and detach from the past and stop yourself predicting the future and just enjoy the present moment. We are conditioned to constantly be on the go and always have an aim. It’s ok sometimes to be aimless and enjoy being in the now.

When we engage in this switching between past and present, it can act as a distraction and affect our concentration levels. It makes it challenging for us to have a sharp focus and can mean that we aren’t fully present with the task or person right in front of us. It’s easy to fall into the trap of replaying the past. We can wish that things had worked out differently or that we had spoken up when we had concerns about something.

All too easily, we can criticise ourselves for mistakes and feel anxious about disappointments and setbacks.  The harsh reality is that it is what it is, it can’t be changed. We can learn to draw the lessons from our experiences and then choose to let the incident go mentally.

When we catch ourselves over thinking and seeking to predict the future, wondering what may happen, we can decide to bring our thoughts back to the present moment.  We can clear and calm our mind.

We can do this by focusing on our breathing by taking a deep breath in and counting to seven, then exhaling to the count of seven. Repeating this process three times can help calm our mind and return to what’s in front of us and enable us to get into the now.

When we over think things, we aren’t completely present with what we are doing or where we are. When we engage more fully with the present moment, we increase our productivity and complete tasks more easily. We listen more effectively and as a result have a better connection and relationship with others.

Quietening our mind helps us to feel centred, relaxed and have a greater sense of assurance. This enables our mind to be clearer, gives us more clarity and increases our focus. When we’re in this state, life appears smoother, easy and effortless and things seem to flow more naturally.

The more time we spend in our heads can lead us to feel less satisfied with life. By reducing the noise and activity in our head and focusing on the now, we can feel happier and in control. I saw a banner outside the British library once which can inspire us all to be present more often.  It said “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift that’s why they call it the present.”

Making a decision to be present more often takes practice as we have years of programming and a way of being to battle. It requires a change of habits and is best achieved by small consistent actions.

You can start your new approach with activities that you do and love such as running, walking, gardening, swimming, cycling etc. You can also choose to adopt a more mindful approach to one of your regular routines such as washing up, vacuuming, eating etc.

Essentially what we are doing with this approach is bringing more focus to the present moment and quietening the mind and away from the constant planning and reviewing process.

This week, why not take a few moments to pause and reflect. Consider what action you need to take to engage with the present moment more often.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself, and know that everything in life has purpose. There are no mistakes, no coincidences, all events are blessings given to us to learn from.” Elisabeth Kubler-Ross.

We live in an increasingly busy world. The development of technology means that we’re always accessible and switched on. This can lead us to feel overwhelmed and mentally drained from the constant interaction with people and having to absorb lots of information.

Having the chance to have some solitude and alone time to quieten our minds and restore a feeling of calm can be very beneficial to our well-being. It gives us a chance to think deeply about what matters most to us rather than being stuck on a hamster wheel and caught up in day-to-day issues.

In western culture, we can sometimes associate the need to be alone and have some quiet time with people who are sad, lonely or anti-social. However, having some quality solitary time can be healthy and enable us to feel better equipped for our interactions with others. It can help us to have a greater appreciation of our relationships and connection with others.

Spending some time like this calms our mind and gives our brain a chance to reboot and replenish itself. In these circumstances we have the opportunity to relax our mind and as a result we may get flashes of inspiration. It could be that it increases our creativity and helps us to devise some solutions to challenges we may be experiencing.

When our mind is quiet and still, it enables us to tune into our inner voice and increase our self-awareness. It enables us to have a better understanding of our true desires and feelings. We make better choices about how we spend our time. This includes who we hang out with and the environments we occupy. Overall, it enables us to set some targets and goals that are aligned with our true feelings and deepest desires.

After a period of relaxed alone time without distractions, we’re able to get clarity on our priorities and what’s most important to us. This helps us to sharpen our focus and make best use of our time. We’re able to concentrate and become more productive. It provides an opportunity to have a break from meeting the needs of others and allows us to focus on our own happiness and well-being.

Slowing down means that we feel less anxious and being still restores some equilibrium to our life. As a result, we’re more relaxed and this is beneficial to our relationships, because we’re less stressed. Therefore, we’re better equipped to listen and understand other people’s perspectives. Quality alone time helps us to build our mental resilience and become more resourceful and self-sufficient, resulting in us having a greater sense of independence and confidence.

Carving out alone time requires effort and planning. It needs to become a habit in the same way you may go to the gym or go for a run or a walk. Conscious effort is required in order to establish and embed a healthy habit.

Here are a few ideas to create some quality alone time: –

Unplug from technology

To help recharge your brain and give it a rest, consider creating some space each day where you disconnect from all forms of technology. Switch off your phone, tablet or pc.

Create a specific time for quiet time  

Make it a habit to have a specific time each day where you meditate or have some mental stillness. It doesn’t have to be lengthy if you are pressed for time. You will notice benefits from just 10/15 minutes a day of quality quiet time.

Journal/creative writing

Immediately after some quiet time, spend 5/10 minutes writing in a journal or do some creative writing. You’ll find that it helps you to problem solve, generate ideas and feel calmer. It’s a positive start to the day if you do this first thing in the morning.

Use your lunch time positively

Have a change of environment and eat your lunch away from your desk. If the weather is warm and sunny, eat it outside. It’s also a great time to get some exercise and go for a walk daily. Brisk walking of 20/30 minutes has great health benefits.

This week, why not take some time out to reflect and consider what steps you can take to create more quality alone time.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“A dream doesn’t become reality through magic; it takes sweat, determination and hard work.” Colin Powell.

I have just returned from a wonderful holiday in Cornwall. During our holiday, we visited the marvellous Minack Theatre near Land’s End. The story of how the theatre was created featured in my first book “Be First Class.”   The Minack is an excellent example of how you can turn a vision into a reality through hard work, determination, collaboration and a bit of faith!

The Minack is an open-air theatre, constructed above a gully with a rocky granite outcrop jutting into the sea. It’s situated at Porthcurno which is 4 miles from Land’s End. It has inspiring and breath-taking views over the neighbouring coast line. If you’re lucky and it’s a clear night, a sunset provides a fabulous bonus to the production.

Many visitors who arrive at the Minack imagine that it was built by invading Romans but the truth is the theatre was the brainchild of Rowena Cade. Miss Cade had moved to Cornwall after the First World War and built a house for herself and her mother on land at Minack Point for £100.

The history of the theatre as stated on the theatre website is that in 1929, a local village group of players had staged Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream in a nearby meadow at Crean, repeating the production the next year. They decided that their next production would be The Tempest. While Rowena Cade did think of offering her garden to stage “The Tempest” there really was nowhere to seat an audience.

Always resourceful she prospected alternatives, one of which was on the opposite side of the bay. Then, looking into the gully above the Minack rock she said “I wonder if we could make a stage here?”  With the benefit of decades of hindsight and with her remarkable theatre spread out below, the answer was clearly “Yes!”

Over the course of six months and during a harsh winter, Miss Cade and her gardener, Billy Rawlings, made a terrace and rough seating, hauling materials down from the house or up via the winding path from the beach below. In 1932, The Tempest was performed with the sea as a dramatic backdrop, to great success. Miss Cade resolved to improve the theatre, working over the course of the winter months each year throughout her life (with the help of Billy Rawlings and Charles Angove) so that others might perform each summer.

Over the next seven years there were many improvements and extensions. Then, with the coming of World War II, it seemed as though all the back-breaking work might have been wasted. When peace returned, Rowena looked out over a ravaged theatre. It had been reduced back to what it had been in 1932. However, with great determination Rowena slowly brought the Minack magic back to life, working on improving and developing the theatre for over 50 years.

Looking at pictures now, it’s remarkable what she and her two helpers achieved.  Apparently, she worked each winter in all weathers until she was in her mid-eighties. When she died, just short of her ninetieth birthday, she was still thinking of the future. She left detailed sketches suggesting how the Theatre might be covered on the days when it rains.

This frail looking lady must have had tremendous faith, strength and determination to achieve her vision. It’s quite remarkable what she managed to create and leave as a legacy. It’s a facility that has thousands of visitors each year and brings pleasure to many who are grateful for Rowena’s work and perseverance.

When thinking about the Minack Theatre and Rowena Cade, a few things occurred to me about the power of having a personal vision and goals. I have shared these thoughts below: –

• When you set a goal or have a personal vision, you have no comprehension of the potential impact it can have on hundreds of thousands of people and the positive ripple it can create.
• It’s incredible what a few committed individuals with a common purpose (working without machinery) can achieve. Truly remarkable and inspiring.
• When you have a vision, it requires lots of faith, determination and perseverance to help you overcome obstacles and set-backs that you encounter along the way.
• Your commitment and resolve will be tested but when you meet and conquer the adversity you emerge stronger and wiser for the experience. You can then look back with a sense of pride at your accomplishment.
• It’s possible to create something that outlasts you.

This week why not take a few moments out to reflect. Consider what one action step you could take to ignite or energise a personal goal that you have.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk