Month: September 2021 Page 1 of 2

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” Oscar Wilde.

This week’s blog is a very special one as I have reached a significant milestone. This is the 400^th blog that I’ve written and published. Little did I know when I posted my first blog on Monday January 21 2014 that over seven years later, I would have written my 400^th blog!

It’s now part of my weekly routine. Discipline, focus and doing something that I love have enabled me to publish a blog every week since that very first one in 2014. A special thanks for his help to Paul Albertson, my web designer, who posts the blogs to my website each week.

When I sat down to write my first blog, which was titled, “Small and incremental steps do make a difference” I had no idea whether anyone would read it or subsequent blogs. I wondered if anybody would find my writing interesting. However, I overcame the apprehension I felt and wrote from the heart. I combined this with a genuine intention and desire to make a positive difference to people’s lives.

I thought that that if I helped just one person, it would make it worthwhile. I pictured that maybe someone in the world might be struggling with something. In order to try to find some inspiration they may do a web search, come across my blog and get a light bulb moment that helps them.

I’ve never been too attached to the outcome of my blog writing. I have written them and then posted them with genuine intentions. I have put them out into the world and trusted that they will help those that they are meant to help. The process of writing the blogs has given me hidden benefits in that they enabled me to write and publish two books.

I seek to ensure that my writing is relatable and grounded in my practical knowledge and experience. I never seek to preach but share my thoughts with the intention to help and serve and assist people to be the best that they can be.

Quite often during my personal development work and when discussing my blog topics, people ask me what I think are people’s most important quality. As this is a special blog, I decided to share what I believe is the most important quality in life.

There’s a sign in my office that provides the answer to this question. It says “In a world where you can be anything, be yourself!”

I believe that being yourself is the most important quality in life. It’s vital to be who you really are and true to yourself. It helps to create an inner peace and contentment.

To be yourself isn’t always easy. It requires courage, determination and lots of self-discipline because we face peer pressure all our life to be a certain way to “fit in.” This particularly affects us in our childhood and young adult years.

It’s not always easy to stay true to yourself because deep down we all want to be accepted and feel part of the crowd.

We live in a very material world and following the rise in consumerism we’re bombarded daily with numerous marketing messages influencing us to buy stuff. We are encouraged to look, dress and act in a certain way.

All of these messages can influence us to become what we think others want us to be and can lead us to overly worry about what people think of us.

On this theme, there is a great quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson; He said “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

Our true self is who we really are when we let go of the stories, labels and judgements that we have placed on ourselves in order to “fit in.” It’s who we are without our social masks.

For me, part of being yourself is making full use of the natural gifts and talents that you’ve been given. These are a unique combination. When we fully use them, we fulfil our true purpose and unlimited potential.

I believe being yourself is also coming from the heart. It’s about speaking with honesty, clarity, pure intention and acting with integrity. If you speak from the heart, you will never be lost for words! This is worth bearing in mind if you’re ever called upon to do a presentation.

Being yourself is essential when you have an important and tough decision to make. At times like these having some quiet time to tune into the messages and feelings contained in your heart can help. This enables you to act upon the wisdom of your intuition.

Being yourself is about being real, authentic and not fake. In doing so, you decide that you’re prepared to show your vulnerability and to be human. It demonstrates that you stand up for what you believe to be true even though you may be a lone voice.

When part of a debate or discussion, it’s about carefully listening and weighing up the merits and pro’s/cons of each opinion and argument, whilst maintaining an open mind and objectivity.

Once you’ve completed this process, you’re able to make a decision on who/what to support based on how you feel about what you’ve heard and considered. In this way, you align with your values and who you really are. You remain true to yourself.

It’s also about not doing things to merely get attention or to please others. We can learn much from watching small children. You will notice how free from attachments they are. They care little about what people think about them. They are just in the moment and more often than not they’re following their joy.

If you are overly concerned about what others think of you, frequently ask yourself “How would I act right now if I had no cares about what others think of me?”

On a final note, as well as being yourself, I firmly believe that it’s vital if you are to be trusted and respected in life that you back up your words with deeds. In other words, it’s imperative that you walk your talk. Therefore, it was so reassuring and pleasing when a client once said to me:

“What I love and admire about you is that you are so comfortable with being yourself.”

This week, why not pause to reflect and consider what action you need to take to just be yourself more.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“The only real valuable thing is intuition.” Albert Einstein.

Over the years I’ve developed the courage to listen to and trust my instincts. Through doing this, I’ve discovered first-hand the power and value of my intuition or gut feelings.

It’s very easy for our minds to get overloaded with all the information we have to process, analyse and assimilate. There are so many forms of technology battling to get our attention and focus.

Using our minds to think through issues logically and to formulate plans and strategies to meet goals and challenges is a great skill to have. However, if we over use this trait and over think situations it can be counterproductive. It can lead us to tie ourselves in knots and lose focus and efficiency. As a result, we can put off making decisions and procrastinate on issues.

Having a busy mind, full of information and mental chatter can prevent us from being able to hear the quiet, subtle and powerful messages provided by our inner guidance system (intuition). Often this inner knowing can be as gentle as a feather touch. Intuition can be described as the ability to understand something instinctively without the need for conscious reasoning.

Lynn Robinson in her excellent book ‘‘Trust Your Gut’’ mentions various business people, scientists and philosophers who have proclaimed the importance of intuition.

Here are a few examples: –

Jonas Salk, the developer of the Polio vaccine, wrote “The intuitive mind tells the logical mind where to look next.”

Warren Bennis, author of books on leadership, change and management calls intuition his “Inner voice” and says that listening to and trusting it is one of the most important leadership lessons he learned.

Richard Branson, the entrepreneurial founder of the Virgin Group stated “I rely far more on gut instinct than researching huge amounts of statistics.”

Clothing designer Donna Karan said “One of our greatest gifts is our intuition. It’s a sixth sense we all have and we just need to learn to tap into and trust it.”

Buckminster Fuller, the futurist, architect and inventor with 28 patents to his name was a big believer in using the power of inner wisdom to create an extraordinary life. He said “Intuition often turns dreams into demonstrable fact.”

Lynn Robinson provides two schools of thought about the origins of intuition. Firstly, synthesis of prior knowledge, which she explains as a blend of logic, experience and subconscious information that’s stored in your mind and recalled when needed. Secondly, a higher power-divine intelligence which she says is “A compass of the soul” that guides, informs and directs you towards success.

There are plenty of situations when it’s important to listen to your intuition, for example, when there’s insufficient data, too much information, conflicting data or when you need to make a quick decision.

Intuition is a resource that if it’s nurtured can create a calmer, focused and more productive way of being.

Here are some ideas to help you develop the ability to hear and trust the messages from your intuition more often:

Quieten your mind – It’s vital that you reduce the amount of mental chatter and activity so that you can hear the subtle and quiet intuitive messages. Meditation and mindfulness techniques help with this.

Ask your intuition for help – When faced with a challenge ask for guidance from your intuition with a specific question. Let the question sit and then record any suggestions of action steps you receive in a notebook. You can then check the accuracy of your insights. This will help you to build confidence to trust your inner voice.

Notice physical reactions in your body – Instincts, hunches and intuition tend to give a physical feeling in your body. Tune into this by noticing when you have a good or uncomfortable feeling. Ask yourself what your body is trying to tell you about a decision you have to make or a challenge or opportunity that you have to consider.

Take regular breaks from your routine – When your mind is full, it’s vital that you take a break from your normal routine and create some space. Go for a walk or do some form of exercise. A walk in a forest or by the sea will calm the mind. New and creative ideas seem to flow from time spent in this way.

This week, why not pause and reflect and consider what action steps you can take to quieten your mind.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“Everyone can do simple things to make a difference, and every little bit really does count.” Stella McCartney.

Making a positive difference in the world is an important part of life to many of us. We want to feel that we have made a positive and unique contribution to help make the world a better place.

I sometimes think that we never really get to know and understand the full impact that our positive actions have on other’s lives and the ripple effect they create.

We never get to fully realise the impact that our encouraging and supportive words had when someone was feeling nervous or their belief has been dented. A simple act like smiling at someone when they’re feeling down can have a positive influence as can random acts of kindness.

The Tom Hanks film “Bridge of Spies” is a true story based on the work of lawyer Jim Donovan who was tasked with negotiating the release/exchange of prisoners between the USA, Russia and East Germany.

The film is a great example of how the tenacity and determination of a human being can positively influence the future quality of other people’s lives and enable them to make a positive contribution to society. At the end of the film, there was some text that came up to say that later in his career, Jim Donavan was involved in the release of over 9000 prisoners in Cuba.

We create ripples constantly by our actions. Each time we buy products it supports the economy and helps to create and sustain jobs. A carefully crafted presentation that we deliver to a colleague or team may inspire them to try a new approach or develop new skills. If we set out with an intention to create positive outcomes and ripples then we are likely to fulfil that objective.

You may have a conversation with a relative, colleague or friend that helps to increase their energy or motivation. It may be that you pass on a piece of knowledge or information that develops someone’s thinking and sparks some new ideas/creativity.

It could be that you create the space to listen to someone outline some thoughts and ideas they have to solve a challenge. In doing so, you may help them create some clarity about the steps they need to take.

Someone that has suffered some disappointment or a setback may have their spirits lifted by the positive words of support and encouragement that you offer them at that the right moment. In doing so you may provide them with the confidence and strength to persevere and to bounce back quickly.

We all have the ability to make a positive contribution and make a difference to our own environments and part of the world in our unique way with our attitude. It is a choice.

As Sir Winston Churchill once said “Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.”

We can choose to create positive ripples.

This week, why not take a few moments to reflect and consider some ways that you can make a difference and create some positive ripples in your environments.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk