Month: April 2026 Page 1 of 2

“If you think you can or you think you can’t, you are probably right.” Henry Ford.

Next week will be the anniversary of a ground-breaking achievement. On the 6th May 1954 at the Iffley Road track, Oxford University, Roger Bannister ran a mile in under four minutes and in doing so helped to change conventional wisdom and the beliefs that people held. The then medical student ran the distance in three minutes and 59.4 seconds!

Prior to the race and his attempt to smash this barrier, people had urged him not to try it. They had told him it was dangerous and life threatening. However, he ignored all this advice and successfully broke the record.

It was an incredible achievement at the time and quite rightly it is still celebrated. Once Roger Bannister achieved this, four runners broke the record within a year because they knew it was possible. Following Bannister’s achievement, athletes changed their beliefs. They told themselves they could do it and as a result their bodies performed more effectively. 

This true story is a great reminder of the power of our beliefs and that we always retain 100% control of them, no matter what is happening around us. Our beliefs play a pivotal role in the results that we achieve in life. They help to shape and influence our behaviour.  Whatever we believe dictates how we respond to situations and determines how we relate to the people that we meet and interact with.

If you believe that you will achieve a goal no matter what life throws at you, then you are more likely to do just that, rather than someone who believes they can never have what they really want.

Most of our beliefs about ourselves and how the world operates are formed in early childhood. They are shaped by our parents, grandparents, relatives, teachers, past experiences, media, culture, peers, friends & religion. Aside from physical differences, it’s our different experiences and beliefs that make us all unique.

We may have false beliefs that stunt our growth. An example of a false belief that was universally accepted was that the earth was flat and that if you sailed far enough you would fall off the edge of the earth. Often, we don’t realise what our beliefs consist of or how they have been formed but they influence every moment of every day.

Every belief has a structure to it which we can change if we choose to. It’s like carrying a recording in our heads. If the recording is working for us, we can keep it and maybe update it occasionally. However, if the recording is limiting us, we can take it out and re-record it, so we have one that will work for us.

We accept opinions from influential people in our lives and hold them as facts. However, they aren’t facts but perceptions formed through our experience and other people’s views. Beliefs are views about us, others and the world. These views determine the decisions we take and the way we behave. If we want to change our results in life then the process starts with changing our beliefs.

Beliefs determine how we think and how we talk to ourselves (our self-talk) and this determines how we behave. If we’re overly self- critical or hard on ourselves then we won’t necessarily enjoy the journey towards a particular goal. We’ll feel stressed, anxious and frustrated from time to time. However, if our self-talk is kinder, more encouraging and positive then the journey will be a more enjoyable one. We’ll feel better and therefore behave more confidently. Our results are likely to be more positive.

There are two types of belief.

We can have empowering ones. These help us to believe that we can achieve. They propel us forward towards our goals and help us to feel confident and good about ourselves.

Alternatively, we can have limiting beliefs. These hold us back, hinder our progress and negatively impact our confidence levels. They may mean that we get in our own way.

There are countless examples of beliefs missing the point. Many said that photocopiers, telephones and computers would not catch on. Look how those beliefs turned out!

It’s important that we continue to challenge the beliefs we have and ensure they are working positively for us.

All of us have the power and control over our beliefs which shape our self-talk/thoughts, behaviour and ultimately our results in life.

This week, why not pause for a few moments and think about what beliefs that you hold that empower you and which limit your performance. Having done this consider if there is anything that you are motivated to change.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“It’s nice to be important but it’s more important to be nice.” John Templeton.

I was talking with a friend recently and we agreed that there is so much conflict and nastiness creeping into the world. There appears to be much anger and resentment expressed on social media and many examples of people being generally unpleasant to each other.

I find this really sad, as I was brought up to have respect for other people and to be pleasant and kind to others. My dad had some words of wisdom about how people should behave as they progressed in their career. These words have stuck with me. He used to say, “it’s important for people to be nice to others on their way to the top of the ladder, as they meet the same people on their way down!”

I know that it’s impossible for us to influence everyone in the world and that some events are outside our control. However, we can all make a difference in the situations that are within our sphere of control and influence.

With this in mind, here are some thoughts on how we can ensure that we are nice and help to make our part of the world a better place:

1. Think about others before we think about ourselves.
2. Say “please” and “thank you”.
3. Smile frequently.
4. Ensure that we apologise and say sorry when we need to.
5. Turn off mobile phones when in conversation with others in order to give them our full attention. This includes family meal times.
6. Respect other people’s time by ensuring we are on time for appointments.
7. Be positive and look for ways to make people feel good about themselves.
8. Ensure that when we give your word, that we keep our promises.
9. Develop the skill of empathy and practice humility.
10. Perform some random acts of kindness without expectation of being acknowledged or thanked.

I know that these ideas are simple but simplicity contains great power. As Leonardo da Vinci said “Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.”

When we’re kind we show people what they mean to us and it’s also a way of expressing our appreciation. Even an act of kindness to a stranger sends out a signal that their life is important and that they matter.

We can be nice by offering a word of encouragement, a kind gesture or giving an uplifting message. This has the ability to elevate someone’s mood and spirit. We can brighten another person’s day with just a few nice words.

How much better would the world be if we all took a little bit more time to be nicer to each other?

This week, why not pause for a few moments to reflect and consider what practical action you can take to help the world to be a nicer place.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

‘’The purpose of our lives is to be happy.’’ Dalai Lama

A few weeks ago, I wrote about the International Day of Happiness and that this year’s theme explored the relationship between social media and happiness, highlighting the potential challenges for our wellbeing as well as ways we can all use technology for good.

After I had written the blog, I was reminded of a simple but powerful exercise I did on my coach training back in 2001. We were asked to answer the question “What is my personal definition of happiness?” with a series of bullet points.

To be happy is a great aspiration for many people but not many people take the time to really think about what happiness means to them. The definition is unique to all of us. For some it’s seeing the family content, success at work, finding and maintaining a close intimate relationship or having a wide circle of friendships. It could be that sporting achievements feature or something like listening to music, watching children enjoy themselves, spending time by the sea, reading a good book, going for a run, watching a film at the cinema etc.

I believe to be happy is an important goal to have in life. I accept that it isn’t always easy or possible to be happy when we suffer adversity. This particularly applies when we have to deal with sad situations such as the bereavement of a loved one or serious health issues. However, having a happy disposition and mindset may allow us to recover and bounce back from difficult and challenging experiences faster.

Having a foundation of happiness within us, helps us to get things into perspective more quickly when difficult people and situations push our buttons. It allows us to move on if we temporarily feel angry, downhearted, frustrated or disappointed. The good news is that being happy is within our control. It’s a choice as Abraham Lincoln said “Most people are about as happy as they make their mind up to be.”

I believe that one rule of happiness is to allow ourselves to be happy in our own skin. This means that we feel at peace and at ease with ourselves, relaxed and grounded with a mindset that we can cope with whatever life throws at us. This will also involve remembering that when the going gets tough to have a belief and attitude that reminds us “This too will pass.” As a result of this philosophy, we can choose not to dwell too long in situations and proactively take action to change things.

In order to be happy, we must:

• Feel that we deserve to be and give ourselves permission to be so.
• Let go of the need to ensure everyone else is happy before we focus on our own happiness.
• Give up a belief that we must be perfect before we can experience true happiness.
• Accept that we are human and will make mistakes.
• Not put the key to our happiness in someone else’s pocket.
• Release the thought that we have to earn the right to be happy.
• Trust that it’s ok for us to be happy and that we don’t need the approval of others.

 
We get one life, it’s short. Everyone has the right to be happy and we can all do our best to not delay or defer our happiness. Choose to be happy, starting right now!

This week, why not pause for a few moments to reflect. Consider what makes you happy and whether you are spending enough time on the things that bring you happiness.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk