Month: January 2022 Page 1 of 2

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” C.S. Lewis.

Over the years many people have shared with me how they had a dream or goal when they were younger and that they have yet to fulfil it.

They talk about what got in the way of their goal not being fulfilled. Some say it was a lack of time or money, a lack of belief or how life just got busy with other things and that they established different priorities. Some mention that they took on other responsibilities and made different choices. Many talk about their regret; sadness and disappointment that they are yet to accomplish what they dreamed about and then say it isn’t going to happen now because I’m too old.

From a personal perspective I understand what it’s like to have an unfulfilled goal. For many years, I had a goal to write a book. As the years ticked by, I thought it wasn’t going to happen and the older I got it just seemed to be more challenging because life had got busier. I can remember thinking one day that I was just too old. I sat down and said to myself “it’s now or never for the goal of writing my book.” I felt that I either had to commit to it fully or let it go forever.

Thankfully, I choose to commit to it fully and by adopting some new disciplines and habits I finally managed to publish my book Be First Class in May 2016 when I was aged 50. I started the process of writing the book by deciding to write the book gradually by committing to write at least 500 words each week and publishing a weekly blog.

Since the day I made the decision, I have written 418 blogs. They have been published every Monday for 418 consecutive weeks. I have never missed a week. This discipline contributed to publication of the book and a follow up book Just Be in 2018.

Now I accept that some goals that you had when you were younger may not be possible because of your age and lack of preparation/training. For example, if these include being a professional footballer, hockey player, an Olympic athlete or swimming champion. However, you may be able to take up a sport for fun but to be one of the world’s elites at a sport may be out of reach. That said there are exceptions as Great Britain’s Jo Pavey won the European 10,000 metres Gold medal when she was 40.

However, your age doesn’t have to be a reason that you don’t pursue a goal. Many people with the benefit of life experiences, great knowledge and wisdom have defied conventional wisdom and achieved a goal.

Here are a few examples of people who achieved a goal in later life:

• Cliff Young an Australian potato farmer won the Sydney to Melbourne ultra- marathon (543 miles) at the age of 61.
• Sam Walton, opened his first Wal Mart store in the USA at the age of 44. Walmart went on to buy the ASDA stores in the UK.
• Laura Ingalls Wilder whose books inspired the TV series Little House on the Prairie was 64 when she published her first book.
• Mother Teresa established the “Missionaries of Charity” organisation when aged 40, leading her to win the Nobel peace prize aged 69.
• Ray Kroc started McDonalds in his 50’s and Colonel Sanders opened his first KFC franchise restaurant when he was 62.
• Susan Boyle had not sung professionally until she was aged 48 and after winning Britain’s Got Talent, landed a record deal and had the largest ever sales for a debut album for a female artist.
• Nelson Mandela became president of South Africa when he was 75.

It could be that you have a goal to start a new hobby, to visit somewhere special, to start a health and fitness regime. Alternatively, you may wish to do some studying, start a business or write a book. Whatever it is for you, get honest with yourself on what your “why” is.

What I mean by this is what is your motivation and desire to do it. Determine why and how it’s important to you.

Once you have done this, I suggest you have your “now or never” chat with yourself. Are you going to fully commit to making the goal a reality or do you need to let it go and place your focus and energy elsewhere?

This week, why not take a few moments out to reflect and consider if there is a goal that you have that you either need to commit to or let go. If you choose to commit, you can then decide what your first action step will be.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

 “Thinking will not overcome fear but action will.” W.Clement Stone.

Many of us start a New Year full of good intentions and desire to achieve some goals and dreams. Sometimes we fail to achieve what we set out to do or are capable of accomplishing because we fail to overcome some personal limitations.

We’re are all born with unlimited potential but on occasions we simply get in our own way and make life more complicated than it really needs to be.  There’s a great quotation by Confucius, “Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated!” Sometimes the biggest limitations we have in life are the ones that we impose on ourselves and have in our own minds.

Fear is one of our biggest limitations (or interferences as I like to call them). Many people refer to fear as “False Expectations Appearing Real!” Much of what we worry about and are frightened by never actually happens. However, this doesn’t stop us worrying!

There are many fears that stop people fulfilling their potential and goals. These include a fear of change and the unknown which keeps some people stuck in their comfort zone.

Also, a fear of rejection stops them asking for what they want, a fear of criticism which prevents them attempting a new approach to a task. A fear of success for some individuals means they self-sabotage their results so that they continue to mesh with the crowd.

The effect of fear on results and people’s lives forms part of the coaching discussions that I have with a fair proportion of clients at some stage. It can be when I’m working with a leader of a blue-chip company, a sales director, someone new to management, an individual looking to start their own business or change jobs.

When people are going through or contemplating some form of change in their life, it can cause fears to crop up. Often people don’t realise the impact that fear is having on them and how it’s holding them back until they start talking about their goals or challenges. It’s normally an unconscious behaviour.

It appears that we’re all afraid of something whether it’s spiders, flying, speaking in public or walking into a roomful of strangers. The philosopher Bertrand Russell said “Fear is the main source of superstition and one of the main sources of cruelty. To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.” Fear is a very small word but can have a massive impact on someone’s life and performance. It can be a powerful and paralysing force.

I was once told we’re born with just two fears – the fear of noise and falling down.  Every other fear we have is a learned behaviour.  The good news about interferences including fear is that as they are a learned behaviour and therefore, we can unlearn them!  It requires us to form some new habits and behaviours. Changing our daily habits and rituals is the starting point that allows us to get out of our own way.

Challenges and obstacles do present us with an opportunity to learn and grow as we discover new depths as we search for solutions to overcome them. We may discover that we are more creative than we realised when we devise solutions that are new and innovative. This can help develop our self-confidence and self-worth. Self-belief can increase when we face and overcome our obstacles. Faith in our ability when confronted with an obstacle is a great habit to develop.

Adopting a positive mindset to interferences and obstacles is another great quality to hone. As is, believing that obstacles are an opportunity to gain new knowledge and experience. Overcoming interferences provides a sense of accomplishment and is a useful future reference point when faced with similar challenges.

If there’s a fear you would like to overcome, getting some external help or friend’s support is a good way to start the ball rolling. It provides an accountability mechanism and is a source of encouragement and external input that we all need sometimes.

This week, why not take a few moments out to reflect and think about the role that fear plays in your life. Is there a fear that is holding you back and preventing you from being the best you can be? If so, what small steps will you commit to in order to conquer the grip that this fear has on you?

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment.” Jim Rohn.

Historically, the start of each year is a time for people to set goals and resolutions for the year ahead. Have you devised some clear goals and targets for 2022? How are you doing with your personal goals and aspirations for this year?

It might be that you set out with good intentions but you have decided to give up already!

At the start of each year, many people resolve to get healthier, exercise more or lose weight etc. Other goals tend to be to save more money or spend less, learn a new skill, quit smoking, find a new job, read more, drink less alcohol, spend more time with family and friends etc.

Previously I did some research on the topic and here is a flavour of what I discovered: –

• A ComRes poll for BUPA suggested 32% of Britons make a New Year resolution.
• It’s estimated that in excess of 40% of Americans make resolutions. Research by The University of Scranton suggests just 8% of people achieve their New Year’s goals.
• A You Gov poll claimed 35% of people in the UK planned to lose weight, 33% wanted to get fitter and 31% wanted to eat more healthily. Other top goals included seeing more of friends and family (14%) or getting a better work-life balance (12%).
• In the ComRes poll 41% admitted to breaking their last resolution, 63% of respondents admitted to having broken one in the past and the majority of these (66%) admitted to doing so within just one month.

People failing to follow through on their intentions can be put down to a variety of factors. It could be a lack of self-discipline, putting others needs before their own, procrastination, not getting clear on the motivation for the goal or spending insufficient time planning their approach.

Another reason that people don’t stick to their resolutions is that they have too many. Sometimes less is more!

A step-by-step approach to changing your lifestyle can be effective. One way to do this is to decide to master one behavioural change before you move onto another. This helps with focus and means that you don’t have to seek to make a whole lot of changes all at once.

This approach ties in with the view that it takes 21 days to break a habit and between 25 and 28 days to create a new one.

So, with the above in mind and in an effort to help you to be one of the 8% of people who achieve their personal goals in 2022, I suggest that you adopt a different approach to New Year resolutions this year.

How about viewing 2022 as a one-year transformation? Your life can be transformed one month at a time. You can do this by having different monthly resolutions.

You can decide at the start of each month what you would like to focus on that month in an effort to upgrade your life.

I suggest that you only take on a new monthly resolution if you feel you have successfully mastered and integrated new behaviours and habits from the previous month.

Imagine how your life will be transformed in a years’ time if you commit and successfully follow through on this new approach to resolutions.

This week why not take some time out to reflect and consider if monthly resolutions will work for you. If so, decide what your first area of focus will be.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk