Month: March 2019 Page 1 of 2

“Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.” Leonardo da Vinci.

In the early hours of this coming Sunday, clocks in the UK will need to be adjusted by one hour as we will enter British Summer Time. It’s always a great moment for me because it means we get to see more daylight and experience longer evenings.

For me, it also represents a time of the year where I take the opportunity to reflect and consider if there is a need for me to let go of anything, to declutter and simplify my life. I feel that clearing clutter helps to create some space for growth, new projects and adventures.

Completing a decluttering exercise always provides me with a sense of completion and accomplishment and it energises me. It also sharpens my focus, provides clarity on my key priorities moving forward and somehow makes me feel lighter.

Clutter is defined in the dictionary as a “crowded and untidy collection of things”. That is true but it is only part of the story and describes clutter on a physical level.

A more complete definition would be:

• Items that you no longer need, want or love.
• Things that are untidy and disorganized.
• Too many things in a small space.
• An overloaded busy mind, with too many priorities to focus on.
• Anything unfinished. This can be projects or emotions.

Clutter can affect us on a physical level and have a negative impact on our energy levels. It can lead us to feel tired and lethargic and make us feel stressed and overwhelmed. Valuable time can also be wasted as we search for things e.g. looking for a document in a pile of papers.

It can weigh us down, make us put things off, procrastinate and keep us stuck in the past. As a result we may not be able to “see the wood for the trees” and there may be no room for anything new to come into our lives.

Disposing of clutter is an important part of the change process and aligns with the Socrates quote “The secret of change is to focus all your energy not on fighting the old but on building the new.”

Pause for a moment and consider how much of your life, home and workspace is taken up with clutter.

Clutter prevents us from focusing on what’s really important and valuable to us, our key priorities and the people closest to us. Everything we have has a call on our attention and therefore the more clutter we have means that more of our energy is tied up in mundane matters.

When we clear out the clutter, it allows us to focus and put the important things in our life into perspective rather than being bogged down in the details of day to day maintenance.

The process of clearing clutter is all about learning to let go. It isn’t just about letting go of the belongings but the feelings and fear that keep us holding onto an excess of stuff. Life is constantly changing, so when something comes into your life, enjoy it, use it well and when it is time be prepared to let it go so that you can experience new things.

As well as physical clutter, our minds can become overloaded and we can suffer from mental clutter. This is a bi-product of the modern world and our access to many forms of technology and distraction. It’s said that our conscious brain can hold just 7 bits of information. Is it any wonder then that we can sometimes feel overloaded mentally given that we’re exposed to millions of bits of information every day?

This week, why not pause for a moment to reflect and consider if you need to let go of anything.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“Success is achieved by developing our strengths, not by eliminating our weaknesses.” Marilyn Vos Savant.

As part of the process when I start coaching a new client I ask them to tell me about themselves. Over the years many people have responded to this by telling me what they aren’t very good at and what they don’t want to experience or achieve in life.

Interestingly, very few people describe what they are good at or what they want to experience and achieve in life. It’s very rare for people to be able to articulate their top strengths. Most people are generally modest and reluctant to talk about their strengths. However, they can easily detail their weaknesses or development needs.

Why are we conditioned to think and talk in this way? In doing so, we may be denying ourselves the opportunity to grow and realise our potential. It’s possible that we adopt this approach because we’re encouraged at an early age to work hard on our weak areas and things that we aren’t good at.

I guess that another reason may be because there’s so much negativity in our cultures. We have school reports that highlight areas for improvement, annual performance reviews that are slanted towards development needs. There are also advertisements that play on people’s fears and promote products that address a problem.

I often wonder what people are missing out on in life by focusing their attention on negatives and improvements rather than playing to their strengths. What impact does it have on the productivity and profitability of businesses by failing to focus on their employee’s strengths?

For many years, I’ve held the view that one of the vital roles of a leader is to identify and nurture their team’s strengths and ensure that they put round pegs in round holes.

We all have strengths and natural talents as well as areas where we’re not so strong.   Having a clear understanding of our strengths helps us to build self – esteem and confidence. It enables us to have a greater appreciation of the value that we bring to tasks, families, teams and our relationships.

Your strengths could be your people, influencing, organisation, planning or creativity skills.  They may include your ability to apply yourself in a disciplined and consistent manner or reliability to get things done. They might be your talent to empathise with others, your intuition or ability to visualise outcomes etc.

I often ask clients what the positive effect on their results and life would be if they had clarity on their core strengths and played to them. Instead of expending time and effort focused on what they aren’t good at and what’s not working. This provides some encouragement to make some changes to their daily habits and behaviours.

I’ve found that when people gain a greater understanding of their strengths and the value they bring to the world they experience greater happiness, fulfilment and increased self-worth. Surely that’s sufficient motivation and incentive to gain more personal insight in this area.

I recommend you dedicate some time developing a list of your top 5 strengths. Once you’ve gained this clarity you can devise some concrete action steps to ensure you use them more often. I’ve found that some people don’t find it easy to come up with their own list. Where it’s proving to be testing, I encourage them to seek input from family members, colleagues or friends.

It’s best to approach people who know you well and can be trusted to give helpful, supportive and honest feedback. Quite often others see our positive qualities and contributions more easily than we do ourselves.

This process helps shine a light on blind spots and helps to positively build self-awareness.

You can ask those closest to you to answer the following questions:

• What do you think is the most interesting thing about me?
• What do you value most about me?
• What do you perceive to be my greatest strengths?

There are also external resources that you can use. For example, the Clifton strengths finder assessment takes about 30 minutes to complete online. It will provide you with your top 5 strengths and a detailed summary. It costs US $19.99 (about £16). This and can be purchased at www.gallupstrengthscenter.com

As with muscles which build with exercise, your strengths will get stronger and more effective the more you use and apply them. It’s likely you will flourish and discover and use more of your potential.

A final thought. Imagine the impact on society if all individuals and teams had a greater appreciation of their own and colleague’s strengths and were encouraged to play to them. I believe there would be higher levels of satisfaction and happiness. Teams would become more engaged and generate better results. I’m sure that the world would be a more energised and positive place to live in.

This week, why not pause for a moment to reflect and consider if you have clarity on your core strengths and what action you can take to use them more.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success.” Swami Sivananda

I was watching a documentary last week about some celebrities who had spent some time working as volunteer Police Officers with Cambridgeshire Constabulary. At the end of the programme, the celebrities were reflecting on their experience. One of them, Jamie Laing, said the following “People say success is money and fast cars etc. but all that stuff is meaningless at the end of the day. What is important is doing things that change people’s lives for the better.”

This really got me thinking about the subject of success.

I’ve discovered over the years, that very few people have taken the time to contemplate how they define success in their lives. We have been programmed to strive for greater wealth, bigger houses, promotions, faster cars etc. In doing so we may under value the contribution we make to others by encouraging them, helping them out, sharing information and ideas and being kind etc.

Thinking about success reminded me that when I was training to be a coach we had to undertake practical sessions with our peers to develop our knowledge. During one of these sessions, I was asked what I’d like to achieve in life. My instinctive reply was to be happy and successful. The follow up question was simple but very powerful, “How do you define success and happiness?”

It was a great question and it helped me to clearly define what success and happiness meant to me. It served as an excellent measurement system as I set off on a new path and started my career as a coach.

Success is defined in the dictionary as the accomplishment of an aim or purpose and the attainment of fame, wealth or social status.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, the American poet and philosopher defined success as follows:-

“To laugh often and much; To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.”

As I mentioned earlier, in today’s society when considering how to measure success many people place much emphasis on academic achievement, the size of property, material possessions, amount of wealth and income.

Whilst I believe it’s great to have nice things, material goods are only part of the story. The way we conduct ourselves, the contribution we make to society, how we share knowledge, use our skills and talents to help others are also important measurements of success.

People may consider themselves to be successful if they are a great parent or partner or if they have stayed happily married for many years. The same could be said if they always honour their word, act with integrity, are kind and stick to commitments. They may also be considered as successful if they meet personal goals such as weight loss or fitness targets or if they maintain healthy habits and are generally disciplined and consistent.

We are all unique and therefore I believe it’s important that we develop our own personal definition of success. This helps us to compare our progress in life to our standards rather than comparing our performance with other people’s achievements.

If you would like greater clarity on your success definition, I recommend that you do the following exercise:

Take a sheet of paper and write down up to 10 bullet points (you can restrict it to 5 points) that reflect success for you. Then give yourself a score out of 10 (1 being low, 10 being high) for your personal satisfaction with each of the bullet points. For the areas where you want to improve, set yourself a target score and note down a few action steps to achieve this. Review your progress monthly.

It’s a simple exercise but it provides clarity and a great framework to compare how you are doing in life against your own unique definition. When I’ve completed this exercise with clients I’ve noticed that their definitions often include things that don’t cost a great deal of money and in some instances are free.

Perhaps there is some truth in the old saying “The best things in life are free.” Success doesn’t have to be all about the size of your bank balance or how fast your car goes. Never underestimate the contribution you can make to the world by simple acts of kindness.

It’s impossible to place a value on what you generate from making a difference to other people’s lives and positively influencing them forever. It will also help to build a long lasting legacy.

This week take a few moments to pause and reflect. Ask yourself, “How do I define success in life?”

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk