Month: October 2019 Page 1 of 2

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” Oscar Wilde.

This week’s blog is a very special one as I have reached a significant milestone. This is the 300^th blog that I’ve written and published. Little did I know when I posted my first blog on Monday January 21 2014 that over five years later I would have written my 300^th blog!

It’s now part of my weekly routine. Discipline, focus and doing something that I love have enabled me to publish a blog every week since that very first one in 2014. A special thanks for his help to Paul Albertson, my web designer, who posts the blogs to my website each week.

When I sat down to write my first blog which was titled “Small and incremental steps do make a difference” I had no idea whether anyone would read this or subsequent blogs. I wondered if anybody would find my writing interesting. However, I overcame the apprehension I felt and wrote from the heart. I combined this with a genuine intention and desire to make a positive difference to people’s lives.

I thought that that if I helped just one person, it would make it worthwhile. I pictured that maybe someone in the world might be struggling with something. In order to try to find some inspiration they may do a web search, come across my blog and get a light bulb moment that helps them.

I’ve never been too attached to the outcome of my blog writing. I have written them and then posted them with genuine intentions. I have put them out into the world and trusted that they will help who they are meant to help. The process of writing the blogs has given me hidden benefits in that they enabled me to write and publish two books in the past four years.

I seek to ensure that my writing is relatable and grounded in my practical knowledge and experience. I never seek to preach just share my thoughts with the intention to help and serve and assist people to be the best that they can be.

Quite often during my personal development work and when discussing my blog topics, people ask me what I believe to be the most important quality in life. As this is a special blog, I decided to write this week’s blog in response this question.

There’s a sign in my office that provides the answer to this question. It says “In a world where you can be anything, be yourself!” I believe that in life, it’s so important to be who you really are and true to yourself. It helps to create an inner peace and contentment.

To be yourself isn’t always easy. It requires courage, determination and lots of self-discipline because we face peer pressure all our life to be a certain way to “fit in.” This particularly affects us in our childhood and young adult years.

It’s not always easy to stay true to yourself because deep down we all want to be accepted and feel part of the crowd.

We live in a very material world and following the rise in consumerism we’re bombarded daily with numerous marketing messages influencing us to buy stuff. We are encouraged to look, dress and act a certain way.

All of these messages can influence us to become what we think others want us to be and can lead us to overly worry about what people think of us.

On this theme, there is a great quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson; He said “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

Why not pause for a moment and consider what it means to you to “be yourself?”

Our true self is who we really are when we let go of the stories, labels and judgements that we have placed on ourselves in order to “fit in.” It’s who we are without our social masks and pretentiousness.

For me, part of being ourselves is about making full use of the natural gifts and talents that we’ve been given. These are a unique combination. When we fully use them we fulfil our true purpose and unlimited potential.

I believe a large part of being yourself is coming from the heart and speaking with honesty, clarity, pure intention and acting with integrity. If you speak from the heart, you will never be lost for words! This is worth bearing in mind if you’re ever called upon to do a presentation.

Being yourself is essential when you have an important and tough decision to make. At times like these having some quiet time to tune into the messages and feelings contained in your heart can help. This enables you to act upon the wisdom of your intuition.

Being yourself is about being real, authentic and not fake. In doing so, you decide that you are prepared to show your vulnerability and to be human. It demonstrates that you stand up for what you believe to be true even though you may be a lone voice.

When part of a debate or discussion, it’s about carefully listening and weighing up the merits and pro’s/cons of each opinion and argument, whilst maintaining an open mind and objectivity.

Once you’ve completed this process, you’re able to make a decision on who/what to support based on how you feel about what you’ve heard and considered. In this way, you align with your values and who you really are. You remain true to yourself.

It’s also about not doing things to merely get attention or to please others. We can learn much from watching small children. You will notice how free from attachments they are. They care little about what people think about them. They are just in the moment and more often than not they’re following their joy.

If you are overly concerned about what others think of you, frequently ask yourself “How would I act right now if I had no cares about what others think of me?”

On a final note, as well as being yourself, I firmly believe that it’s vital if you are to be trusted and respected in life that you back up your words with deeds. In other words it’s imperative that you walk your talk. Therefore it was so reassuring and pleasing when out of the blue a client said to me recently:

“What I love and admire about you is that you are so comfortable with being yourself.”

This week, why not pause to reflect and consider if there are any situations in your life that require you to speak your truth. If so, what will be your first step?

What action do you need to take to just be yourself more?

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk</p

“Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.” Leonardo da Vinci.

I had a few days holiday recently in the beautiful counties of Kent and Sussex here in the UK. It gave me time to pause and think in lovely surroundings.

The weather was warm and sunny so therefore I was able to spend lots of time outdoors and cherish the beauty of nature. During the week, I reflected on how lovely it was to enjoy some simple things like walk on the beautiful cliffs of Dover and see the sun glisten on the sea below. I had some walks in forests, ate an ice cream by the sea etc.

I concluded that simple things in life can bring so much pleasure.

We get so caught up with work, family commitments, pursuing goals and earning money that it’s so easy to lose sight of the value of stopping and focusing on simple pleasures. Sometimes these things don’t cost a great deal of money but bring a lot of joy and good feelings. Quite often the best things in life are free!

Life can get so busy that we can have limited time to enjoy the simple and important things in life. It’s easy to take these for granted. As I watched some men empty oysters from their fishing baskets, it reminded me of the story of the Mexican Fisherman.

The Mexican Fisherman

A US businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican fishing village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the boat were several large yellow-fin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.

The Mexican replied, “Only a little while, senor.” The American asked why he didn’t stay out longer and catch more fish. The Mexican said that he had enough to supply his family’s immediate needs.

The American then asked, “But what do you do with the rest of your time?”

The fisherman said, “I play with my children, take a siesta with my wife Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos.   I have a full and busy life, senor.”

The American smiled, “I have a Harvard MBA-that’s a degree in business studies – I could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds buy a bigger boat, with the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats, eventually you would have a fleet. Then instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution. You would, of course, need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then Los Angeles and eventually New York City where you would run your expanding enterprise.”

The Mexican fisherman asked, “But, senor, how long would all this take?”

The American replied, “Fifteen to twenty years.”

“But what then, senor?”

The American laughed, “That’s the best part. When the time is right you sell your stock to the public and become very rich. You would make millions.”

“Millions, senor? But then what?”

“Then you would retire, move to a small coasting fishing village, where you could sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take a siesta with your wife Maria, and stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with the amigos.”

With just the hint of a twinkle in his eye, the fisherman said, “Senor – are these business degrees hard to get?”

This week, why not pause for a few moments and consider what steps you can take to bring greater balance to your life.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk</p