Month: September 2018 Page 1 of 2

“Always seek out the seed of triumph in every adversity.” Og Mandino.

I love it when synchronicity happens in my life and have always been fascinated by the subject. It’s defined in the dictionary as “the simultaneous occurrence of events which appear significantly related but have no discernible causal connection.”

Some people refer to it as serendipity. There’s a film with that title starring John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale which is often shown at Christmas. It’s set in New York and contains many happy and beneficial chance events.

Wikipedia suggest that synchronicity is a concept, first introduced by analytical psychologist Carl Jung, which holds that events are “meaningful coincidences” if they occur with no causal relationship yet seem to be meaningfully related.

I experienced an example of synchronicity recently during the course of one day. Early in the morning when sorting through some papers I came across a piece of writing called Carrots, Eggs and Coffee. Shortly afterwards I read the same passage in a book. Then to my amazement it was included in an email that I received!

I wondered why I had seen this piece of writing so many times in one day. The answer came to me in the afternoon during a conversation with a client. They talked about some of the adversity they were facing and how they were feeling a little downhearted and dispirited.

In an effort to provide them with a bit of inspiration and a different way of looking at the situation I shared the story.

Carrots, Eggs and Coffee

A young woman complained to her mother about the hardships and difficulties in her life. She didn’t know how she was going to continue and wanted to give up. The young woman said, “I’m tired of fighting and struggling. It seems that as soon as one problem is solved, a new one appears.” In response, her mother took her to the kitchen and filled three pots with water, placing each on the stove over a high flame.

Soon the water came to boil. In the first pot she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil, without saying a word. In about 20 minutes, she turned off the burners. The mother then fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She removed the eggs and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her daughter, she said, “Tell me what you see.”

“Carrots, eggs, and coffee,” the daughter replied. Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After peeling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich flavour.

The daughter then asked, “What does it mean, Mother?”

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity, boiling water and each reacted differently. The carrots went in strong, hard and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, they softened and became weak. The eggs had been fragile, their thin outer shell protecting their liquid interior, but after the boiling water, their inside became hardened. But the ground coffee beans were unique—after they were in the boiling water, they’d changed the water itself.

The lesson that the client was able to draw from the writing was that their perception was their reality. They had a realisation that the way that reacted to the adversity was going to have a bearing on the outcome and they needed to try a different approach.

Incredibly another piece of synchronicity happened when I was writing this piece. I had the radio on in the background. When I typed the word reacted, the presenter used the word reacting at exactly the same time! It made me smile!

During the course of this week, why not take a few moments to reflect and ask yourself how you can apply the wisdom contained in Carrots, Eggs and Coffee to any situations that you’re facing.

Also why not look out for synchronicity in your life and consider what it’s teaching you.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“Your mind knows only some things. Your inner voice, your instinct, knows everything. If you listen to what you know instinctively, it will always lead you down the right path.” Henry Winkler.

Last Tuesday marked the 17^th anniversary of the awful 9/11 attacks on the United States. It was a devastating day for the world. The four co-ordinated attacks using passenger aircraft killed 2996 people and injured 6000. The attacks led to the collapse of the North and South towers of the World Trade Centre and cost $10 billion in infrastructure and property damage.

I remember that day vividly and can recall the immense shock and sadness that I felt. It was hard to comprehend and take in what had happened. The day had added significance for me. Having just completed my Executive Coach training and gained a qualification, I undertook my first official client coaching session at 2pm that day (UK time). This was 9am in New York. The first attack happened 14 minutes before this and the second 3 minutes later.

I was taught a very profound and valuable lesson about the importance of listening to my instincts/intuition from a story about 9/11 that I was told by a man I met at a conference many years ago.

He told me that he used to work in one of the twin towers. A few months before the attacks, he woke up one morning and a voice inside him told him to quit his job as it wasn’t making him happy. He was scared of the risk of quitting a well-paid job without a new job to go to.

However, something inside him convinced him that he had to trust the message and take action to prioritise his happiness and mental well- being over a salary cheque. He was told that everything would be ok if he made the change and moved on.

Thankfully he honoured his inner voice and intuition and resigned from his position. He left the job a few weeks before the attack. He wasn’t in New York at the time of the attacks because he had taken a break to go travelling and think about what to do next.

If he hadn’t have done so, I wouldn’t be able to tell you this story, as sadly all the people who worked on the floor where he worked were killed. He was extremely grateful that he trusted his instincts but understandably very sad that many ex-colleagues lost their lives.

Sometimes our minds can be so busy that we can’t hear the subtle messages of our inner voice. This can also happen when we over-analyse situations.

Using our minds to think through issues logically and to formulate plans and strategies to meet goals and challenges is a great skill to have. However, as with all things, if we over use this trait and over think situations, it can be counterproductive.

It can mean that we procrastinate, tie ourselves in knots and lose focus and efficiency. Having a busy mind, full of information and mental chatter prevents us from being able to hear the quiet, subtle and powerful messages provided by our inner guidance system or intuition.

Albert Einstein once said that the only really valuable thing is intuition.

Clothing designer Donna Karan said “One of our greatest gifts is our intuition. It’s a sixth sense we all have and we just need to learn to tap into and trust it.”

Richard Branson, the entrepreneurial founder of the Virgin Group once said “I rely far more on gut instinct than researching huge amounts of statistics.”

There are plenty of situations when it’s important to listen to your intuition, for example, when there’s insufficient data, too much information, conflicting data or when you need to make a quick decision. It also helps when your vision has become foggy or when you feel stuck.

Intuition is a resource if nurtured that can create a calmer, more focused and productive way of being. In order that you can hear more messages from your instincts, it’s important that you quieten your mind.

Reducing the amount of mental chatter and activity will help you to hear the subtle and quiet intuitive messages. Taking time to meditate regularly to practice yoga or use mindfulness techniques will help you to achieve this.

Have there been times were you have listened to the wisdom from your inner voice and been thankful that you have done so?

Alternatively, have there been times when you have ignored what your instincts were telling you and have regretted it?

This week why not take a few moments and reflect on how busy your mind is. What action can you take to quieten your mind?

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“It’s amazing to see the beauty of the world. It’s so beautiful and so brutal. It’s a reminder that every second of life is precious.” – Sally Green.

Modern living is so busy that it is so easy to take our life for granted.

All too easily we can fail to fully appreciate our good health, the people in our life, all that we have and the opportunities available to us. There have been a couple of things in the past week that have had a significant impact on me and made me stop and think.

Firstly, I saw a sign that said the following:

• I woke up
• I have clothes to wear
• I have running water
• I have food to eat
• Life is good
• I am thankful

A few simple words but a strong powerful message and reminder to me to count my blessings and be grateful for many things.

I then read a news story about a BBC newsreader called Rachael Bland, aged 40. The article said that Mrs Bland had revealed a few days earlier that she had just a few days to live after a two year battle against breast cancer. She had been told in April that it was incurable.

It moved me when I read that Rachael was spending her final days wrapping 18 years of birthday presents for her son. She put together a collection of keepsakes to help her son Freddie, aged three, remember her after she’s gone. She put aside notebooks, perfume and personal items so Freddie won’t forget what his mother smelled and sounded like.

I found Rachael’s love, courage, thoughtfulness and kindness in such sad and cruel circumstances to be so inspiring and a lesson about what really matters in life. The real wealth in life is good health.

I felt very sad when I heard a few hours later that Rachael had died and it made me think about the importance of being glad of life. I have shared below a piece of writing that I came across many years ago on this theme.

Be Glad of life.

“Because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars; to be satisfied with your possessions; to despise nothing in the world except falsehood and meanness, to fear nothing except cowardice; to be governed by your admirations rather than by your disgusts; to covet nothing that is your neighbour’s except their kindness of heart and gentleness of manners; to think seldom of your enemies, often of your friends and to spend as much time as you can, with body and with spirit.

These are little guideposts on the footpath to peace.” Henry Van Dyke.

Life is precious and every day is a gift. We may experience hardship and challenges from time to time. Notwithstanding this, there is always something to be grateful for and a blessing to be found if we look hard enough.

Life is short and this is sufficient motivation for us to be happy, positive and kind. It’s also a good reason to ensure we don’t waste too much time or energy engaged in negativity, anger, conflict, sadness, frustration or disappointment.

This week reflect and ask yourself:

Where do I need to show greater appreciation for anyone or anything in my life?

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk