Month: November 2019 Page 1 of 2

“Be the change that you wish to see in the world.” – Mahatma Gandhi.

It isn’t always easy to stay positive in life. We all have challenges to face from time to time. Also through the media we learn about senseless tragedies in the world. It can be hard to stay upbeat when we learn of tragic events.

That said it’s within our control to make small daily contributions to help the world to be a better and kinder place. We can personally decide to be leaders and role models for positive change in the world. Our kind actions can speak louder than words. Collectively over time these small personal actions will make a big positive difference to people and environments.

I’ve been wondering how we can “Be the Change” to ensure our relationships with others are constructive and that our home and working environments are positive, harmonious and encouraging. One way we can do this is to stay positive. Additionally, we can also encourage others close to us to extend a little more kindness and generosity towards other people.

We can consider what support we can offer to help our family, friends, neighbours and colleagues to be the best that they can be. In doing so, we can look for other people’s good qualities and show gratitude for the contribution they make to the world.

Here is a piece of wisdom I read many years ago about making a difference in the world:

“A Bishop’s Tomb”           

“When I was young and free and my imagination had no limits, I dreamed of changing the world.

As I grew older and wiser I discovered the world would not change, so I shortened my sights somewhat and decided to change only my country but it too seemed immovable.

As I grew into my twilight years, in one last desperate attempt, I settled for changing only my family, those closest to me.

But alas, they would have none of it.

And now I realise as I lie on my deathbed, if I had only changed myself first, then by example I might have changed my family.

From their inspiration and encouragement I would then have been able to better my country.

And who knows, I might have even changed the world.”

This piece of writing is a great reminder that we all have the ability to make a positive contribution to the world. Change starts with ourselves and it’s our personal responsibility to lead by example and create the circumstances that we wish to experience. It also reminds us to not put off making a positive difference in the world.

We make a difference to our environments and relationships with the energy that we bring to them. It’s within our power to create positive energy by feeling joy and gratitude. Thankfully, it’s within our gift to be grateful for the good fortune we experience and appreciate all that we have in life.

Thankfully, we all have the opportunity to reframe challenging and negative situations. When we do this we shift our energy positively. This can be achieved by us looking for the blessings and gifts that we gain from challenging experiences and the vital lessons that we learn from them.

This week, why not take a few moments to reflect and consider what practical action you can take to “Be the Change” in the world and make a positive difference to your home and working environments.

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” Aesop.

Last Wednesday was World Kindness Day and this is celebrated annually on 13th November. On this day, participants attempt to make the world a better place by celebrating and promoting good deeds and pledging acts of kindness, either as individuals or as organisations.

It was first launched in 1998 by The World Kindness Movement, an organisation formed at a 1997 Tokyo conference of like-minded kindness organisations from around the world.

There are currently over 28 nations involved in The World Kindness Movement which is not affiliated with any religion or political movement. The mission of the World Kindness Movement and World Kindness Day is to create a kinder world by inspiring individuals and nations towards greater kindness.

Whilst I think it’s great that there is a day dedicated to celebrating and promoting kindness, there’s also a part of me that finds it sad that there isn’t more kindness expressed in the world already and throughout the whole year.

Perhaps we can all learn from the Dalai Lama who, when asked about his philosophy to life said “Be kind.”

Research suggests that there are many benefits to us being kind. It makes us healthier, happier and can improve our results. It gives us a greater sense of wellbeing, makes us more emotionally resilient and reduces our stress levels.

People have many different motivations for performing acts of kindness. These can range from the desire to give something back, to helping themselves to feel more purposeful. It can be as simple as wanting to feel good.

A piece of research from British Columbia University suggested that people who were given $50 to spend, got more pleasure from spending it on others than spending it on themselves.

Acts of kindness can take many forms and range from planned activity such as volunteering our time to a worthy cause to more spontaneous acts. It doesn’t have to involve money. There are many simple ways we can all perform small acts of kindness.

For example, we can give a compliment, smile at a stranger, perform some chores for an elderly person, visit someone who lives alone, buy a cup of coffee for a homeless person or donate unwanted items to charity.

We could make a loved one a cup of tea or coffee and do the same for a colleague who is under pressure. We can let someone go in front of us in a queue, give an unexpected gift or some form of recognition or appreciation.

We can be there for someone who is going through a challenging time and actively listen to what they are saying without judgement. This simple act of caring can help someone feel valued and better.

Each act of kindness may seem tiny but it actually brings about change and shifts the way we see ourselves and others. This in turn changes the way that others see us. Kind actions affect people’s lives in a positive way. They may inspire and encourage others to perform some kind acts too.

Kindness can also have the effect of helping us to feel more grateful for what we have in life and optimistic about the future.

Reflect and ask yourself:

What can I do to help create a kinder world?

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

     “Acceptance and tolerance and forgiveness, those are life-altering lessons.” – Jessica Lange.

Last week in the UK a general election campaign was officially launched. This means we now have 5 weeks’ worth of campaigning to look forward to/detest, depending on your point of view about politics!

We are quite a divided nation at present and emotions are running high. Views are getting extremely polarised and people are taking pretty entrenched positions. As a result, there is bound to be much mudslinging, argument and conflict between the various political parties and their representatives as they canvass for votes.

This is one of those times when I will seek inspiration from one of my favourite quotes by Reinhold Niebuhr. He said “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.”

As I witness some of the campaigning I will have to remind myself to accept that I can’t change how the various politicians behave towards each other, despite not liking their aggressive and confrontational behaviour.

Acceptance gives us great power if we use it in the right way. It helps us to remain calm in a busy world and when faced with adversity or things we dislike.

Acceptance is defined in the dictionary as “The action of consenting to receive or undertake something offered.” It is also defined as “The process or fact of being received as adequate, valid or suitable and agreement with or belief in an idea or explanation.”

For me that only tells part of the story as I believe there are many other meanings and benefits to the word. Here are a few thoughts on the value of acceptance and how it can help us to be first class personally and professionally.

When we are accepting of something, we are able to:

• Manage our anxiety and stress levels.
• Accept things as they are rather than how we would like them to be. This contributes to a calmer mind.
• Think of possibility and opportunity rather than looking to rewrite history.
• Live in the present moment and not be hindered by the past.
• Look for solutions to challenges rather than spending time wishing things were different.
• Become more accepting of others and to be in a state of non- judgement and have no malice towards them.
• Have greater tolerance of other people’s views and opinions. We accept people as they are rather than how we would like them to be.
• Look at people’s strengths and qualities rather than their flaws and weaknesses.

We can apply the principle of greater acceptance to ourselves too and become more accepting of who we are. As a result of this approach we can develop greater pride in our qualities, accomplishments and achievements. This will help us to expand our appreciation of the value we bring to the world and the contribution we make. This will contribute to greater feelings of confidence and self-esteem and ensure we are properly appreciated and respected by others.

When we have a greater appreciation of our natural gifts and talents, we spend less time and energy focused on our weaknesses and what we lack. This also allows us to stop wasting precious energy comparing ourselves to others. Instead we become more single minded and focused on our goals and desires.

As Reinhold Niebuhr’s says we can accept the way things are and what we cannot change. This allows us to let go of the things that we can’t control and change. We can then divert our focus onto changing and influencing the things that are within our sphere of control.

Finally, we can learn to accept gifts and compliments from others and be grateful for all that we have in life. In doing so, we will develop an attitude of gratitude.

This week, why not take a few moments out to reflect and consider where you can develop greater acceptance of situations and people. What would be the benefits to you if you were to do so?

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk