Month: April 2019

“The ultimate value of life depends upon awareness and the power of contemplation rather than upon mere survival. “Aristotle.

As it was the end of March last week and the end of the first quarter of 2019, I took some time out to reflect. I reviewed the progress I’ve made since the start of the year towards the various goals that I set for 2019.

I never used to find it easy to take time out to reflect as I felt that I should be doing something and to be honest I didn’t really appreciate the value of regular reflection. As a result, I didn’t always make the progress on goals that I could have done. By not reflecting I didn’t change my approach to things or change my course soon enough.

In addition to the reflection on goals progress I’ve mentioned, I also set aside at least 10 minutes each day to meditate. I record any thoughts, feelings or insights in my journal immediately afterwards. This regular practice helps to increase my inner calm and keeps me grounded. I have found it to be an excellent way to increase my self-awareness, reduce the clutter in my mind and tune into my true feelings.

Regular reflection/contemplation is a healthy habit that has proved to be extremely beneficial to me. It has helped to contribute to more efficient use of my time and increased goal achievement. It’s a healthy habit that I wholeheartedly recommend you adopt if you are serious about being the best you can be.

Each year many people set some resolutions for the New Year. These may include changes that they want to make to their life, goals they want to achieve, some unhealthy behaviours that they want to change or some healthy new behaviours they want to create.

Sadly, many fail to honour and maintain the resolutions beyond the end of January. A reason for this may be that they don’t dedicate sufficient time to allow good new habits to develop and form or to reflect on their progress.

When you embark on a journey of personal change or look to accomplish a personal goal, there are some characteristics and qualities required in order to ensure success and achievement.

These include effective planning, as well as a strong belief that it’s possible to accomplish your goal and be successful. A determined approach, self-discipline to manage distractions and in order to use your time effectively. Perseverance is required to help you overcome any difficulty, obstacles or opposition and ensure that you keep taking action.

Change takes energy and therefore it’s important that you give yourself the best possible chance of success by being energised and in good shape mentally and physically.

Essentially, in order to successfully implement personal change and turn your goals into reality you need to develop and use good habits. We truly are creatures of habit as research suggests that 90% of what we do each day is habit. Every day from the time you get up to the time that you retire to bed; there are hundreds of things that you do the same. This will include the way you shower, dress, eat breakfast, brush your teeth, drive to work etc.

The positive aspect of habits is that they free up your mind while your body is on automatic pilot. For example, you are able to plan your day whilst you are in the shower or driving to work. The negative aspect of habits is that they get locked into our sub-conscious mind and create self-defeating patterns that can inhibit our growth, limit our performance and prevent us from fulfilling our potential.

Changing and creating habits takes time. As a result of comments made by Dr Maxwell Maltz in his book Psycho-Cybernetics published in 1960, it’s been believed that it takes a minimum of 21 days to change a habit. However, research by University College London in 2010 stated that it may take as much as 66 days for a new habit to fully form. They suggest that the duration of habit formation is likely to differ depending on who you are and what you are trying to do.

Habits can hinder rather than help us and limit our results in life. These include overcommitting our time and spreading ourselves too thin, an inability to say no to unreasonable demands, not effectively managing distractions and interruptions, procrastinating and not following through on plans.

It’s worth bearing in mind that your established habits are producing your current level of results. It was Einstein who said the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. If you want a different set of results, you have to adopt a different approach.

If at any time you’d like to create improved results, better relationships or greater happiness, it’s important that you create good healthy habits that help you to maximise your opportunities and fulfil your potential. A good place to start is to set more time aside for personal reflection.

This week, why not pause for a few moments and reflect on the following questions:

• What habits and behaviours do you need to start doing?
• What habits and behaviours do you need to expand?
• What habits and behaviours do you need to stop doing?

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

“You can’t pour from an empty cup. Take care of yourself first.” Author Unknown.

I have had the mis-fortune of suffering from a cold over the past week. Whilst feeling a little out of sorts and not full of my usual vibrancy and positive energy, I reflected on the value of good health.

I concluded that it’s very easy to take good health for granted. As I have mentioned in the blog previously, good health is the real wealth in life. Thankfully I soon recovered from the cold and I believe my swift recovery was in part because of the healthy habits that I practice.

During the week, the quotation by Mother Theresa came to mind “To keep a lamp burning, we must keep putting oil in it.” This inspired the topic for this week’s blog. If we are to achieve all that we are capable of in life, it’s imperative that we take care of ourselves.

The phrase self-care has gained in popularity over recent years and reminds us of the importance of taking care of our needs, so we can be the best that we can be. It prompts us to take care of our physical needs (getting enough sleep, right diet, exercise etc.); emotional needs (asking for help when needed); mental needs (stimulating job, interests, personal development etc.); spiritual needs (time for prayer, meditation etc.).

Increasingly in my coaching work, I am seeing many examples of people struggling to cope with the pressures of modern day living. They find it a challenge to balance the demands of their work with their home life and in some cases, parental responsibilities.

We live in an information rich and time poor world. As a result, many people feel overwhelmed by all the information they have to process each day. They also struggle to juggle different priorities, sustain high performance levels and lead happy balanced lives.

There is a metaphor that I always refer to when I wish to illustrate the importance of self-care. I learned it by boarding a plane. Have you noticed that when the plane’s cabin crew make the safety announcement they always give a specific instruction?

The crew tell you that in the event of an emergency (when the oxygen mask appears) to apply your mask first. They say that you must do this before you attempt to help others with their mask. The reason for this is that if you don’t have any oxygen/energy you won’t be in a position to help others.

We all have to take action to look after our needs more from time to time. It’s important that we apply our oxygen mask sometimes. On occasions, we have to put ourselves first so that we can be the best we can be and have the energy to help others.

Many people put others needs in front of their own, as they feel it self-indulgent to put themselves first. They feel that by doing so it’s at odds with how they were taught in childhood not to be selfish.

The key to this is to have balance between the amount that you care for others and your needs. Being well rested and looking after your health means that you have the requisite energy you need to help those around you. If you’re regularly tired because you have irregular sleep patterns, skip meals or fail to get some exercise, then start making these things an absolute priority.

Here are a few self-care tips and healthy habits that I recommend:-

• Do 30 minutes of physical exercise every day. This can be daily walking, running, cycling or you could do a gym session.
• Ensure that you get enough sleep, so your body has time to relax and recover. Keep your sleep patterns regular; go to bed and get up at the same time every day.
• Minimise the amount of caffeine that you have on a daily basis and keep alcohol intake within the recommended weekly limits.
• Remember that laughter is the best medicine. Find the funny side of life. Regularly put time aside to watch some comedy or funny movies.
• Avoid toxic and negative people, situations and environments. Ensure that you spend time doing things and with people that energise you.
• Give up being a people pleaser. Ensure you please yourself first and do what makes you happy.
• Unplug from computers, laptops and phones on at least one day a week. Give your brain a rest and be totally in the moment.
• Keep hydrated – Drink plenty of water. The recommended daily intake is 1.5-2 litres a day.
• Be kind to yourself and ensure that your self-talk is encouraging and positive.
• Be comfortable saying no when you have numerous demands on your time.
• Stop worrying about and let go of things that you can’t control.
• Eat 5 pieces of fruit or vegetables every day.
• Spend 10 minutes a day meditating or in quiet mindful contemplation.

This week, why not pause for a few moments and reflect on the following questions:-

• What action do you need to take to put your needs first more often?
• What do you need to do to create more energy and balance in your life?

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk