Month: September 2014

Last week, I was preparing for a presentation that I was delivering on September 4th.

As part of my preparation, I did some research on what had happened on that day in history. I discovered that in 1882 Thomas Edison’s Pearl Street electric power station began operations in New York City. It was the first display of a practical electrical lighting system.

Edison is regarded as one of the most successful inventors of all time. He invented an astonishing 1093 things including the phonograph (early version of a record player), motion picture camera and the incandescent light bulb. He is featured in a book, “People who changed the world.”

Edison had little formal education; he was expelled from school because his teachers thought he had learning difficulties. In fact he suffered from hearing problems throughout his life. Edison’s enormous achievements were entirely due to years of hard work and his natural intelligence. Interesting how he did not allow his teacher’s judgements to hold him back. I think we can all learn from this story.

We all face adversity, challenges, obstacles, frustrations and set-backs at times in our lives. Life is not always a bed of roses or plain sailing and that applies to everyone whatever their status or level of success.

When in the middle of periods of misfortune or challenge it is easy to lose perspective, become downhearted and wonder if things will ever improve. It can have a detrimental effect on our levels of confidence and belief. Sometimes we have to experience difficulty and tough times so that you can develop a greater appreciation of the good times and be grateful for the periods of pleasure.

When pursuing a goal or a dream, whether it is starting a business, pursuing a new career, starting a new hobby, looking to lose weight or starting a fitness regime, it is easy at the first sign of a setback to give up and settle for what is known.

Not everyone today regarded as a success, always had it easy.

For instance, we may never have heard a record from the Beatles, if they had taken rejection as a sign to not pursue their passion.

When they first started out, a recording company turned them down and said “we don’t like your sound and guitar music is on the way out.” That was a costly judgement on the record company’s part!

Many people may not have viewed a Disney movie or visited Disneyworld if Walt Disney had given up when he was fired early in his career by a newspaper editor because ”he lacked imagination and had no good ideas.” He suffered business failure, bankruptcy and was turned down an incredible 302 times by banks when he was seeking funds to establish his theme park.

He never gave up on his dream to create Disneyworld. It took him years of hard work, raising finance, dealing with disappointment but Disney stayed focused on his goal.

The Harry Potter movies and JK Rowling’s books are hugely popular across the world with lots of people. They may have been denied that pleasure; if she had let difficulties she experienced in life hold her back.

Prior to the books being published, she was virtually penniless, depending on welfare payments to survive and help bring up her son as a single parent. She was divorced and severely depressed.

Adversity can be a Lesson

The busyness of our lives doesn’t always allow us sufficient time to pause and appreciate the people we have around us. Adversity often awakens us to the things that are far more important than money and material possession: our health, our family and our friends.

Sudden financial losses can teach us that we do not have to base our happiness on money. An illness teaches us to be humble, to see every day as a gift, to live more in the moment and motivate us to lead a healthy life. A sudden loss in the family brings in sharp focus the cycle of birth, life and death.

Adversity can be a signal to do something new

Sometimes adversity comes to our lives to suggest that it’s time for you to change direction. For instance a loss of a job can be a scary place and a very uncertain time. An event like that can hit confidence and self-esteem. It’s is easy to fall into that trap of wishing that things were different, to blame yourself or other people involved. Whilst totally understandable, we know intellectually that all that time, energy and analysis will not change the situation.

Acceptance at the earliest possible time allows new possibilities and opportunities to be explored. It can lead to personal development, growth and greater levels of fulfilment.

I know that it is pointless living life in the rear view mirror.

I hope that the article has helped you and given you some added motivation, inspiration and energy to persevere with a project or goal where you are feeling stuck or were about to give up.

This week’s quotation:

“Don’t worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss every day when you don’t even try.” Jack Canfield

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk

It’s easy for us to fall into the trap of focusing our mind on what we lack, what’s not working and what’s wrong with life.

Falling into this habit does not help our energy levels, mood or help us to maintain a positive outlook. In today’s fast paced world with countless demands and distractions, we can all easily forget and take for granted things to be grateful for.

For instance, how at the turn of a tap we have fresh running water that we can drink and wash in, at the flick of a switch we have electricity to power the kettle to make a hot drink when we wake up and listen to the radio (except when we have a power cut like we had at home last week!) or simply that we have the gift of life.

I have found that being more deliberate about practising gratitude and acknowledging all that there is to be grateful for in life helps my energy levels, keeps me happy, positive and better equipped to deal with challenges and hassles that we all inevitably face from time to time.

When I first started deliberately practising this approach, I wrote a list of 50 things to be grateful for which I added to over the course of a month.

I still refer to this list time to time when things do not go as planned, if I am facing an obstacle or if my energy level drops. It always lifts my spirits and puts things into balance and perspective. After reading the list, I remind myself that whatever issue I am facing “this too will pass.” It’s a bit like pressing a reset button on your computer.

Another practice that I have found helpful is to take the time to acknowledge positive events when they happen. I make a note of such events on post it notes which I put in a jar. I note down acts of kindness, positive feedback, receipt of income, gifts, unexpected windfalls, great customer service and nice experiences such as days out, time by the sea, nice meals, going to a concert, sporting events etc.

At the end of each year, I take out the notes and read them all. I have found this to be an excellent way to appreciate all the things that I have been fortunate to experience during that year. It is a great ending to the year as I prepare and look forward to the New Year with positive expectation.

Finally, before I go to sleep each night, I take the time to mentally acknowledge at least 3 things from the day that I can be grateful for.

Robert A. Emmons & Michael McCullough are two of the leading scholars on the topic of gratitude and they have researched and written about its power to boost happiness. In one of their studies, they carried out research with 3 experimental groups over a 10 week period.

1. The first group was asked to write down five things they were grateful for that had happened in the last week for each of the 10 weeks of the study. This was called the gratitude condition.

2. The second group was asked to write down five daily hassles from the previous week. This was the hassles condition.

3. The third group simply listed five events that had occurred in the last week, but not told to focus on positive or negative aspects. This was the events or control condition.

Before the experiment began participants had kept daily journals to chronicle their moods, physical health and general attitudes. These were then used to provide a comparison for after the experimental intervention.

People who were in the gratitude condition felt fully 25% happier – they were more optimistic about the future, they felt better about their lives and they even did almost 1.5 hours more exercise a week than those in the hassles or events condition.

Martin Seligman is a leading expert on positive psychology and a very successful author. He has also looked extensively in his work at the effect and benefits of practising. He has found that writing down what you are grateful for has the ability to shape your mood positively in lasting ways.

This week why not take some time to write a list of things that you are grateful for – aim for 50 things and then add to it over the coming month?

This week’s quotation:

“Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” Marcel Proust

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk