“Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.” Helen Keller.

One of my key learnings form coaching thousands of people over the past 19 years is that a major obstacle to individuals achieving their goals and dreams is low self-confidence and self-esteem.

Confidence is the strength of our belief in our capabilities to perform at a certain level, learn new things and achieve goals. Self-esteem is confidence in one’s own worth or abilities.

When we are confident, we feel ready to explore all the possibilities that life offers. We feel more equipped to take risks and seize opportunities. It helps us to perform at our best professionally or when we engage in sporting and other leisure activities. It has a positive effect on our happiness levels.

When we’re in a confident state, we embrace life’s challenges and see them as a chance to grow, evolve and learn something new. We don’t run away from situations, we stand up, take responsibility for making change happen rather than wish that things were different.

When we feel confident, we’re willing to stretch ourselves, move out of our comfort zone and into new territory. We overcome any nerves or anxiety that we may be feeling and move on regardless. We do this content in the knowledge that things will turn out how they are meant to.

Having a confident feeling also enables us to cope better with set-backs and provides the momentum and drive to persevere when pursuing goals. When we take action and get results it helps to bolster and top up our confidence levels. Taking control of our destiny helps us to feel good and resourceful.

It’s still possible to feel confident but also have a sense of anxiety about important projects or issues. However, the difference between confident and less confident people isn’t about how much they feel fear. It’s about how confident people cope with those feelings and deal with their situations regardless of any fears or doubts.

Beliefs play a strong role in developing confidence. As Henry Ford once said, “If you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re probably right.”

Our beliefs mould and influence our behaviour. Whatever we believe dictates how we respond to situations and the people we meet in our lives. If we believe we will always find a way to succeed no matter what, we’re more likely to do just that.

Most of our beliefs are formed by the age of seven. They’re shaped by our parents, grandparents, relatives, teachers, past experiences, media, culture, peers, friends & religion. Aside from physical differences, it’s our diverse experiences/interactions, schooling etc. that make us all different and unique.

In most cases we don’t realise what our beliefs consist of or how we have formed them. Yet they influence every moment of every day. Every belief has a structure to it which we can change if we choose to.

It’s like carrying a recording in our heads. If the recording is working for us, we can keep it, maybe updating or refining it from time to time. However, if the recording is limiting what we think about ourselves, we can take it out and re- record it, so we have one that is working for us.

We accept opinions from influential people in our lives and hold them as facts. They aren’t facts at all but perceptions formed through our own experience and other’s views. If we want to change our results it starts with changing our beliefs.

Beliefs define how we think and talk to ourselves (our self-talk). In turn, this determines how we behave. If we’re overly fearful about our prospects, we need to start talking to ourselves in a more empowering and positive way. This will make us feel better and our results are likely to be more positive.

There are two types of belief; empowering (where we believe we can achieve). They propel us forward towards our goals, we feel confident and good about ourselves. The opposite is limiting beliefs; these hold us back, hinder us and make us feel bad/less confident.

A famous example of how people changed their beliefs and conventional wisdom is Roger Bannister breaking the four-minute mile record. People urged him not to try it, telling him it was dangerous and life threatening. He remained confident in his ability to achieve this monumental feat. He persevered and broke the record. Once he’d achieve it, four runners broke the record in a year.

All of us have the power and control over our beliefs which have an important role in shaping our self-talk, thoughts and confidence levels. This influences our behaviour and ultimately our results.

This week, why not take a few moments to reflect and consider what steps you can take to increase your confidence levels. What will be your first step?

To arrange a free no obligation consultation, please contact Stephen Pauley via the contact form or by e mail: Stephen@befirstclass.co.uk